60 Jokes for July 4th That Let Laughter Ring
Updated: Jun. 14, 2024
Land of the free, home of the brave and enough jokes for July 4th to keep you laughing all day long
July 4th is the pinnacle of summer—a day off from work and maybe a trip to the beach with friends or a barbecue with family. You probably have a bunch of fun ideas for the 4th of July, and perhaps you’re even planning to watch a patriotic 4th of July movie after your local fireworks display. But regardless of your plans, if you have these jokes for July 4th on hand, you’ll keep everyone laughing.
Whether you’re looking for Independence Day jokes with a historical flair or just some fun firecracker jokes to end the night with a bang, we have them all right here. Happy 4th of July!
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Best jokes for the 4th of July
- What did the colonists wear to the Boston Tea Party?
Tea-shirts.
- What was the most popular dance in 1776?
Indepen-dance.
- What does the Statue of Liberty stand for?
It can’t sit down.
- If you cross a patriot and a dog with curly hair, what do you get?
A Yankee Poodle.
- What ghost haunted King George III?
The spirit of ’76.
- What do our flag and a sad candy cane have in common?
They’re both red, white and blue.
- Was the Declaration of Independence written in Philadelphia?
No, it was written in ink.
- Why did Paul Revere ride his horse from Boston to Lexington?
Because the horse was too heavy to carry!
- What is the most popular sport on the 4th of July?
Flag football.
- What protest by a group of dogs occurred in 1772?
The Boston Flea Party.
- What did a patriot put on his dry skin?
Revo-lotion!
- Did you hear the one about the Liberty Bell?
Yeah, it cracked me up too!
- Which colonists told the most jokes?
Punsylvanians!
- What is red, white, blue and green?
A seasick Uncle Sam.
- What does the Statue of Liberty say when visitors leave?
“Stay in torch!”
- What do you eat on July 5th?
Independence Day-old pizza.
- What did Luke Skywalker say on the 4th of July?
“May the 4th be with you!”
- Why did the corn on the cob go to the 4th of July parade?
Because it heard there would be a-maize-ing floats!
- What was the wildest battle of the Revolutionary War?
The Battle of Bonkers Hill.
- What are the most patriotic flowers?
Yankee Doodle Dandylions.
- Why did the hot dog go to the 4th of July party?
Because it heard it was buns of fun.
- Did you hear about the angry firecracker?
He was so mad that he exploded!
While you’re sharing these jokes for July 4th, see if you can nail this 4th of July trivia.
4th of July jokes about America
- How come there aren’t any knock-knock jokes about America?
Because freedom rings.
- What kind of tea did the American colonists want?
Liber-tea.
- What did one American flag say to the other flag?
Nothing. It just waved.
- Which flag is the most highly rated?
The American flag. It has 50 stars!
- What do you call an American revolutionary who draws cartoons?
A Yankee Doodler.
- Why were the first Americans like ants?
They lived in colonies.
- What do you call an American drawing?
A Yankee doodle!
- What happened as a result of the Stamp Act?
The Americans licked the British.
If you want to escape for the holiday this year, check out these perfect 4th of July getaways.
4th of July jokes about fireworks
- What do you get when you cross a dinosaur with fireworks?
Dino-mite!
- Why did the duck say bang?
Because he was a firequacker.
- Why doesn’t fire get to enjoy a day off on the 4th of July?
Because fire works.
- What do you serve with cheese on Independence Day?
Fire crackers.
- Why did the firecracker go to the hair salon?
It needed to trim its bangs.
- What’s Uncle Sam’s favorite snack?
Fire Cracker Jacks.
- Why should you research fireworks before purchasing them?
To get the most bang for your buck!
- What did Polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?
A fire cracker.
- What did the little firecracker say to the bigger firecracker?
“Hi, Pop!”
- What did the firecracker eat at the movies?
Popcorn.
- Why did the firework become a teacher?
Because it wanted to spark curiosity in students.
- What did the lightning say to the fireworks?
“You stole my thunder!”
Jokes for July 4th aside, make sure you go see the best 4th of July fireworks in your state.
4th of July jokes about presidents
- What’s the difference between a duck and George Washington?
One has a bill on his face, and the other has his face on a bill.
- What was George Washington’s favorite tree?
The infantry.
- What is George Washington’s favorite football team?
The New England Patriots.
- Who was the biggest jokester in George Washington’s army?
Laughayette.
- What would you get if you crossed George Washington with cattle feed?
The Fodder of Our Country!
- Which Founding Father is a dog’s favorite?
Bone Franklin.
- What do the moon and the Founding Fathers have in common?
Both have been through revolution.
We hope you’re loving these jokes for July 4th. Celebrate the day by sharing inspirational July 4th quotes too!
4th of July one-liners
- Whenever the dogs decide to have a 4th of July reunion, they choose to go for a bone-fire.
- Since it’s the 4th of July, let’s indepen-dance the night away!
- A battery and a firework were arrested—one was charged, while the other was lit off.
- My great-grandfather was a soldier and a patriot, and in order to treat his wounds and scars, revo-lotion.
- A number of people cracked up the liberty bell, so they received a no-bell piece prize.
- I’m sure the fireworks sales around the 4th of July are booming.
- The fireworks at Mount Rushmore weren’t as good as they were last year—it was a monument-al disaster.
- After the soldiers’ haircut yesterday, they went flying. Turns out, they went to the American Hair Force.
- I heard the Declaration of Independence was placed in the museum—now, they call it the Decoration of Independence.
- All of my fingers were injured in the 4th of July fireworks. My closest friends say that they can’t count on me anymore.
- The pre-ramble was included in the first part of the Declaration of Independence.
Now that you’ve chuckled at these jokes for the 4th of July, laugh some more at these summer memes you’ll also want to share.
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Reader’s Digest has been telling jokes for more than 100 years, curated and reviewed over the last 20 years by Senior Features Editor Andy Simmons, a humor editor formerly of National Lampoon and the author of Now That’s Funny. We’ve earned prestigious ASME awards for our humor—including comical quips, pranks, puns, cartoons, one-liners, knock-knock jokes, riddles, memes, tweets and stories in laugh-out-loud magazine columns such as “Life in These United States,” “All in a Day’s Work,” “Laughter Is the Best Medicine” and “Humor in Uniform,” as well as online collections such as short jokes, dad jokes and bad jokes so bad, they’re great. You can find a century of humor in our 2022 compendium, Reader’s Digest: Laughter, the Best Medicine. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.
Originally Published: May 11, 2021
